Ultimate Cliche of a MR High School
by independentwriter-137
Summary: You know the typical cliches, Lissa being a slut, Brigid being a cougar, Max the new kid, Fang the emotionless rock and yet suddely declare his love for Max. Well, I decided to do a parody to show how ridiculous these cliches are. WARNING: BIZZARE CONTENT


**A/N. I've decided to do a parody on your typical cliché MR high school story. WARNING: Extreme OOCness, exaggerated plots, and basically the WEIRDEST story you'll probably read in a while.**

Fang flipped his beautiful, long emo hair out of his eyes. Of course, he didn't look gay doing it like Justin Bieber does because, well he's Fang.

The girls passing by him fell face first onto the floor. He passed by them of course, oblivious to his good looks. He didn't believe in love! His first girlfriend broke his heart by sleeping with another man! Oh the pain, but of course he didn't show it. He was after all a stone. And a brick wall. And an impassive monster.

Then Lissa came strutting down the corridor butt naked because she's so much of a slut that she finds it much easier to walk around nude.

"Hey, Fang! Wanna have some fun! I know you'll say no but I'm such an oblivious selfish bitch that I won't take no for an answer!" she purred.

"Oh Lissa, go find someone else to show your sluttiness to! I don't believe in love and I never will!" he declared.

Just then a stunningly beautiful girl came bursting in. She was so beautiful that it was indescribable. A goddess! Her friend was equally as gorgeous except she didn't seem to shut up.

The moment Fang saw the goddess he knew she was the one! He loved her already; she made him want to open up and scream stupid mushy poems to the world!

"Lissa! I've changed my mind, love is real!" he said and chased after the girl.

"What is your name?" he asked.

"My name is Max. It sounds like a boy's name but I don't care. I am a girl who finds dresses and makeup and love and mushiness repulsive! Now I will slap you for being nice, you sexist pig!" she said and slapped him so hard he went flying. You know, because she's so strong for a girl.

"Hi!" a boy greeted and she kicked his butt to Timbuktu.

"Wow, Max you're so strong! I'm not that strong. I love to state the obvious and talk about obnoxious things! I'm super annoying aren't I? I'll go on and on about something that doesn't matter. More like pointless ramblings, did you know that? You don't ramble. Oh I have to talk about fashion cause' you know I'm such a diva! I love clothes and makeup and all that junk. Did I say junk? I didn't mean junk. I wonder how many words I've said so far. I bet it's more than fifty already. I keep talking and talking about nothing really and I bet the readers won't even read this whole paragraph and just skip through it since it's pointless! I wonder how I talk so much without drinking a gallon of water. Oh I keep talking, I like Justin the gay Bieber, and makeup, and clothes, I always seem to talk about the same stuff that I bet I sound redundant—"

By some miracle, her tongue fell off!

"HAHA! You're tongue fell off!" Max laughed.

"Pish chucks," Nudge groaned.

Without warning, Angel came running though. Screaming her head off about how the teacher said she couldn't run the world.

Fang became a different person, he transformed into a caring, loving comforting boy.

"There, there, Angel! Conquer some other world!" Fang told her.

Angel sprouted horns and nodded. "Conquer time!"

Max upon seeing this fell in love with him instantly! She was so wrong about him.

"I'm sorry for how I treated you, I'm madly in love with you now," she told him.

"Really? I love you too! Someday I wanna have your babies!" Fang said happily.

He kissed her and they saw fireworks. Literally. Gazzy and Iggy were such pyros that they brought fireworks with them to school on a daily basis.

"Awesome dude!" Iggy yelled.

"Yeah—fart—it—fart—was—fart" Gazzy replied.

Iggy then suffocated from Gazzy's farts and died.

Max pulled away. "I'm sorry but I'm abused by my dad and I cut myself and I'm only pretending to be strong. I'm afraid of this. I'll run away now."

Then she ran away at the speed of light, leaving Fang depressed.

"I'm so sad! I'll write depressing emo poetry!"

Just then Brigid Dwyer came in too!

"How—fart—are—fart—all—fart—these—fart—people coming in?" Gazzy asked.

"Oh, Fang," said the fifty year old scientist.

"I'm a sorry excuse of an adult who can't get a man her own age! Would you like to go out with me?" she asked him.

Fang was heartbroken and not thinking straight because Max just had that effect on him. "You're so smart! And you have red hair! Sure!" Fang said then kissed her.

Max came back; ready to apologize for her breakdown when she saw the two!

She cried and ran away.

"Ew! Get away from me you piece of filth," Fang said and chase after her.

"Max!" he yelled, it was raining all of a sudden—how convenient.

"I announce my undying love for you no matter how out of character it is! I'm always described as an emotionless rock yet it seems I keep confessing my feeling to the world as if was Nudge. Oh, Maximum, you have stolen my heart! Where did my love start? We're Romeo and Juliet; I love only you dear do not fret! I did not mean to kiss the red head. Please no more tear shed! I'm reciting a totally stupid poem, now forgive me so we can go…home? Does that rhyme?" he asked her.

"Yeah."

"Home! Forgive me so we can go home! I love you forever!" Fang announced and broke out into a dance number.

Max was sobbing uncontrollably, "Of course I forgive you! I was stupid not to. I jump to conclusions because I have such a big ego that I always think I'm right!" she said and hugged him.

"I know you do but I love you anyway. Because love is not only blind but it's deaf too."

"And brain dead, can't forget brain dead!" Max reminded.

"Love is brain dead!" Fang agreed.

Then he whipped out a carriage from a pocket and together they rode off into the sunset and live happily ever after!

"Where does—fart—that—fart—leave—fart—me?"

**A/N. There we go! I'm bored, just came from exams, and on a sugar high. What did you think? Hate it? Love it? Don't give a damn? Want it off fanfiction? Drop a review and tell me!**

**-Indy**


End file.
